People's success (or otherwise), in the dating pirhanna pool is pretty much decided before the age of 7, long before dating even becomes a thing. It is engrained and taught self-negativity and self-denigration from a toxic family environment.
Early habits are impossible to kill. Dating failures and duds were made that way very, very early in life.
Some grow up with an abiding, aggrieved sense of resentment once the penny drops; we retreat into our own world, isolated and shy away from situations in which we must be taunted by the spectacle of the valued and nourished receiving the most basic of human validation. This is why I avoid going out to waste money on expensive food and drink by myself, to be noted as the weirdo who is sat alone.
Some of us up the ante and go out with a bang, but most of us don't. This is whey they will always win.
The stack is rigged against you, especially when the social cynic manipulators can sense your weakness and vulnerability; this is why the educationally, culturally and intellectually inferior are in the ascent, whilst quality-grade People are sentenced to a life of abject humiliation and rejection.